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Good morning! It has been a while since I have written. I am sorry and will not take that much time without warning again.

I have just single handedly figured it all out! Actually I have had this epiphany before several times, but each time I have it, it is like THE BEST DAY EVER! Let me set the stage for you and maybe too will find freedom.

Sometimes in life we are faced with trials that are bigger than us. We may feel a sense of responsibility to stand strong and muster up all we can to persevere. Often in these trials we learn things about ourselves. Even if the lesson is remembering what weakness feels like.

In most cases we bounce back and all is well, but sometimes we feel the wounds of the battle and we find ourselves far from home. There are different reasons for that feeling.

One, we have leveled up, meaning, lessons learned have caused us to grow past what we believed or knew before, and like a video game we have new tools and we are in a new land. This can be an exciting adventure if we approach it right. We can happily grasp our new tools and satchel heading out into uncharted territory carelessly leaving old behaviors behind.

Or two, we do not bounce back and we find ourselves lost and confused. The new land is too much for us. We have been changed so drastically that we don’t recognize ourselves anymore. What do we do then?

Well, we find supportive friends to help us, we pray our faces off, we ask for help, but what if we still feel lost? What if we can’t pray? What if we begin hear ourselves say things like: Why pray? What is the use? What can I do? My gifts aren’t that important.

When you begin to hear negative thoughts that you can’t control and they go from thoughts to statements, then there is a cure! I am a positive person. I am usually on my game and confident not of myself but in Christ who gives me strength; however, after this last trial I experienced I landed in reason number two.

I was not bouncing back like I should. The idea of leveling up was not encouraging me. It was discouraging me. What I had not realized was that my thoughts had gone from ones I could control to ones that became statements. I began to rely on myself forgetting once again the simple truths of God.

A friend, anonymously, slipped a journal and a note in my bag last night. It reminded me that our gifts come from God and if that is true then all I need to do is be obedient and trust that He will use me and my gifts as needed. This somehow simple reminder and act of love gave me yet again the answer to all my insecurities and yours… It is and always will be this statement…I AM A CHILD OF GOD!

If then I am a child of God, He brings the strength and all we need to walk out our gifts in faith. We need not worry about how we will mess up, or wonder where the direction will come from. Another friend reminded me yesterday that when all is quiet and we can’t seem to gather our thoughts enough to pray through these things, we just sit and listen. “He leads us beside still waters.” Psalms 23:2

So, If you find yourself anxious, out of control, fearful, lost, alone, or lacking, remember the simple truth that you are a Child of God.

Reflective reading suggestion Psalms 23

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