I am faced again with the choice to review my thoughts and challenge myself to a renewed mind. I am struggling to find my value and I need to sort it out. I could say I am not valued because I am not feeling valued, but that is not true. The truth is I don’t feel valued because I am not sure of the value I bring.
Not knowing my value is on me. I have been feeling useless lately. It is time for me to challenge that feeling and get to the bottom of it.
Feelings bring on a series of questions for me. This process started years ago when I was in recovery from an abusive relationship. The trauma had me in a post-traumatic state. I would have extreme reactions to everyday things. Counseling taught me to separate the rational response from the overreaction which linked to my past. She called it unraveling the yarn.
I have gotten quite good at this process, and it has come in handy for most of my feelings because it taught me to challenge my thoughts for what they are and not blame others or misplace my feelings in the wrong place.
Where is my value? What do I bring to the table? How can I do what I do and do it well?
I have a purpose when I live on purpose. I am grateful when I live out gratitude. Value is no different. I have value when I live it out. I need to know it.
The last year has challenged me in so many ways. I am once again at a crossroads. Will I crush under the pressure of my feelings, or will unravel the yarn and live it out?
We all have value. What is yours; how will you live it out?
2 comments on “Unraveling The Yarn”
The way others treat, and especially those we trust the most, have such a profound effect on the way we see and feel about ourselves. I often think about how differently we see ourselves if we had parents, siblings and partners who thought we were fabulous, and had always treated us as if we were wonderful people.
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I wonder if no matter our upbringing if insecurity still lurks and tries to corrupt our confidence? Really good question. Thanks for your thoughts!